I do not have the courage to write it out until now. Bothering me were really some trivial things, like wedding invitations. I received 2. One formal, and one informal invitation over email. It made me wonder if I was petty or bitter. I swear it was the first time I received an invitation which says Paley and partner. That kind of shocked me because I don’t have a partner to bring along. And I don’t really know the person who invited me that well enough to pick up the phone and tell her I did not have a partner to bring along. You see, that’s the thing about chinese weddings. I know I must have touched on this at least once, but if you bring a partner along, you have to pay or your partner has to pay too. And we’re talking about the need to know the market rate of prices, and different hotels has different prices, not much difference, but you ought to know. I am one who really isn’t particularly fond of chinese wedding dinners, too many frills and details, you probably don’t feel good too if you did not pay the share of your partner, afterall you know how much 1 banquet table costs. I don’t think I’ll be going to the formal dinner because I do not know anybody else other than the bride and I admit I did not want to look a little out of the place being the only odd one there without a partner. But I’ll be phoning the bride to hand deliver a nice gift to her.

I will probably be going to the informal wedding, because it is only 1-2 hrs at the most, and my friend has kindly asked a few questions in his email, which are:

1. Would you be able to make it on 5th July (sat)

2. Would you like to bring your partner?

3. Can I have your address, please?

4. Can I have your answer, now? (he he, thanks)

Most of all, I will know a couple who will be going, Tracy being one of them, so I won’t feel out of place.

Today, I read an article on Streats and one of the journalist wrote that she had STD. Not what you’re thinking, but it stands for Small Talk Disorder. I thought of myself as I read that article. She’s definitely not alone. I don’t know how to make small talk, and don’t really like to make small talk to strangers too. I think I fared better now than the past, because I actually feel more comfortable with a few business colleagues or trainers, because they just emit a very friendly feeling.

Just yesterday, I had a good example of how bad I do in small talk conversation, constrained in a lift. Oh well, ML and I were going lunch, hopped into the lift together with 3 other colleagues. People whom we don’t really mix or talk to because we don’t have anything in common other than working together in this building. Frizzy bear just had to ask the most obvious question, Where is Tracy? I forgot who answered her, but I don’t think it’s me, saying she’s off at the conference. I was standing in front, and just faced the door. Frizzy continued asking, how come she’s involved? I don’t know who she is directing the question to, me? So I didn’t answer her. An odd aura of silence permeated the lift, and I recognized Frizzy has realised she made a fool out of herself talking to herself, with nobody answering her enquiry. The lift opens, ML and I walked out. I hear tiny whispers behind us and I know Frizzy must be gossiping that we’re so unfriendly and ignored her. Not that I care much. She doesn’t realised the whole lift is filled with her voice, hers only.

If my friend is reading this, I hope she doesn’t get the wrong idea that I do not like her enough to go to the wedding, I just don’t do so well in social occasions like this.

<< ~ >>